As I type this O Fortuna plays ever so appropriatley in the background. While you read keep in mind what O Fortuna (scroll down to Carmina Burana) sounds like! This is again the type of day I am having. I promise soon I will blog without complaining...but it will NOT be today. My version of the song is from Opera Babes....yes I like opera. So on to the whine! Get your opera viewing glasses on and enjoy the show....we ask you to remain silent until the end.....
The day started of with my husband and I in a horrific fight.....he acted like me...scary! Cue the song.....
It was one of those fights that come along about every six months with a lead up time of a month of bickering. Each of the bickers seems to get worked out with the repetitious sorry emanating from my husband. Then two minutes to two hours later he repeats the same behavior. My husband is the renaissance man...my mother refers to him as an eighteenth century poet. He fits this image....he looks similar to JFK Jr. (horrible brag right here....) but with softer features, longer eyebrows, thinner frame, long fingers and hands (come on now get your mind away from there....) dark hair, tall at six foot three, and he has an innocence to his sweet face...His attitude is usually very calm amidst my raging dramatic moods. He is so cute because he keeps notes in his palm pilot on what not to do as a husband. In every fight the palm pilot earns a few more medals. He cannot wait to have children, he loves to tango, ballroom dance, gives great hugs, massages me to my heart's content, and says things like whatever will make you happy. So what is his problem?
He lives in the past and the future but never in the now. He is a thinker...I know what he is thinking and he often gets in trouble for just thinking...he hates this. He constantly wants to better himself and learn anything he does not know...I am somewhat similar...Together we are Mr and Mrs Question. Side story...Tangent alert.....My father lives on a boat with Stepmom Scott. In each stateroom there is a list of rules to follow as living on a boat is very different than living on land. Different uses of water, toilets, kitchen etc. abound. When my husband and I went to visit a new rule was added...no more than 30 questions a day! Back to my husband....so instead of getting what needs to be done asap he stays busy with his mistress...the computer.
She keeps him in the office for all hours of the night. When he gets into bed I always smell that computery smell on him. I am a jealous wife what can I say...I have told him I think something is going on but he says that nothing is....but the smell says someting else. So he works hours on end for his day J-O-B in the evening, stays busy making our website for our rental business (this has yet to get completed), or dilly-dallys around on some new metaphysical knowledge. This is only way one that not living in the now manifests. He often does not hear what I say ( I know this is typical man behavior...but dammit I do not have the typical man...I expect so much more out of him).
He is really nifty all around but lately he has just gotten on mu last nerve. He is a cancer and when they do not get their crabshell time...LOOK-OUT! I am sure it does not help that this house is filled with our terrific friends Chasmyn and her husband. He has also not been meditating like he usually does...It must be that bitch computer....I will claw her eyes out if I ever see her! Oh yeah I am actuallly stroking her as we speak...Come to think of it I kind of like her.....She is intelligent, has lots of good info, quiet soul, and downright sexy with her blue lights, grey body and sleek black outline.....wheeww I am getting turned on...maybe there is room for one more...threesome!
The fight ended up with my husband crying (oh my litte heart breaks for him when this happens because this is when I know he finally gets it) on the porch of one of our rental units. The tenant who is a friend of ours stepped out just at that point and my husband's repy was "allergies" ...tenant made a hasty exit stage left not buying a word of it. David cried and we said a nice goodbye as I had to get to work cleaning this place . He wanted to leave on a really positve note so he requested that I do this cute little bunny hop thing where I hop up to his face and give bunny kisses.
The good thing about our fights is once they culminate things are always so much better on the other side....and then we have a few months of bliss. It is like our tango...the better we get to know one another the better we dance together.
The cleaning lady was there helping me...my tenant had left a huge mess in the basement. So we decided to start upstairs. The brushes came up missing. I realized there was some damage from the last tenant that I had never noticed. I also noticed where the contractor smeared paint all over the baseboards. I was begining to feel as if the G-ds were out to get me like yesterday. I found some other problems with the money pit. I dropped a dirty bucket of water all over me. A rag vanished out of thin air. I was really starting to hear snickering coming from the sky. The adult G-ds must be out leaving the teenage G-ds at home to run things.....Damn Kids.....Shit I hope they did not hear that.
Then the electric company came to check out a problem and flirt with me....You know I was looking all sexy with my stained white shirt, sweaty ass, and hair not brushed. The man flirtatiously said things like "major electrical safety hazard" and "fire hazard" and what really made me wet..."this could catch fire any minute". He sooo wants me. All this talk of fire and electricity....shhhhh do not tell my husband.
Oh did I tell you about the brown recluse I found on the third floor? Also in the last few weeks that it has been vacant the freezer stopped doing its thang...freez'in. Did anyone see that last episode of complete home makeover...the one where dangerous mold made their house unlivable...this was my freezers state.
I was so waiting for Ty Pennington (I think this is his name) to show up on the door step.
I rushed my work over there because I had an appointment with a lady at my house who was going to have a SEANCE with my dead ovaries. I ran home, showered, got the stink off of me. She had cancelled but I did not know it so could have continued to work.
Oh my gosh I forgot to say in the middle of my dirty work scraping paint of the filthy floor (note I was sticking to the floor with my sweaty legs) the phone rings. It is my mother describing how she jsut got engaged for the third time. Now I have very mixed feelings about this which I am sure I will cover at a later date in detail but lets just say now I feel like I am losing my home all over again. Her ring is five carats! Hmm let me see that is approximatly five IVF treatments. I am a little bitter. I am also kind of happy for her even though I watch her galloping ahead and leaving me in the dust....Oh I know I am 27 years old and still want a mommy that I never had....I was always happy in my childhood when she ran off to be happy but know it finally has made me mad. The anger that I should have felt then has now caught up with me.
Little things are jsut driving me nuts these days. I am sinking among the frustations. Hey but on a positive note I did not even mention anything about babies...oh damn I just did.
O Fortuna (Chorus) O Fortune
O Fortuna O Fortune,
velut luna like the moon
statu variabilis, you are changeable,
semper crescis ever waxing
aut decrescis; and waning;
vita detestabilis hateful life
nunc obdurat first oppresses
et tunc curat and then soothes
ludo mentis aciem, as fancy takes it;
potestatem and power
dissolvit ut glaciem. it melts them like ice.
Sors immanis Fate - monstrous
et inanis, and empty,
rota tu volubilis, you whirling wheel,
status malus, you are malevolent,
vana salus well-being is vain
semper dissolubilis, and always fades to nothing,
et velata and veiled
michi quoque niteris; you plague me too;
nunc per ludum now through the game
dorsum nudum I bring my bare back
fero tui sceleris. to your villainy.
Sors salutis Fate is against me
et virtutis in health
michi nunc contraria, and virtue,
est affectus driven on
et defectus and weighted down,
semper in angaria. always enslaved.
Hac in hora So at this hour
sine mora without delay
corde pulsum tangite; pluck the vibrating strings;
quod per sortem since Fate
sternit fortem, strikes down the string man,
mecum omnes plangite! everyone weep with me!