Man, I have major guilt making me post right now. I meant to finish my thoughts that night so most never would have had to wait for my news but as usual there was poop to clean up, sleep to get, whining to do, and of course food to eat. Sorry.
Ok, the reason I wanted to put this in a different post was because it effects so many areas of my life. I am not sure what angle to even start with. I feel like a floundering new journalist with her first big story.
Once upon a time The Little Gourmet lived in Mexico. She was happy then. She lived with her dog Bently, two rescued kitties from the mercado, and swayed in endless hammock time she referred to as her beau. Yes, things were good for her there. Endless sunshine, miles of beach, good air, and delicious food. The best thing is that she ovulated in this far off land. She was relaxed! However she was missing one thing that would make this story perfect....Love.
She searched for her prince among toads, far off lands, prayed to the tree faerys to sprinkle love dust (scientifically a cousin to "baby dust" that most of you are familiar with), and yelled for out for him into the winds so that her lovely voice would fly upon the wings of the wind to her prince. Knowing that there was not a direct flight upon the wind to the states she opted for a layover in Atlanta but alas she made it home to St Louis.
Once home she did indeed meet the prince of her dreams. They kissed and lived happily ever after........oops time for some editing.
No, they did not live happily ever after. They did have the best which is a romantic love filled with silly dancing and merriment but life in Gourmetland was less than enchanting. The prince, despite his dashingly good looks and qualified resume, could not seem to find princely work. Nor were his magical sperm rushing into battle on white horses. The delicate princess Gourmet moped around the castle screaming "NO I WILL NOT BLOOM WHERE I AM PLANTED. FUCK THAT! SOMETHING HAS GOT TO GIVE".
Many years went by and children did not arrive in their castle. The prince still spoke his Mr Positive speech from the castle balconies. Soon the towns people grew tired of the same old speech and whispers arose and could be heard on the cobblestone streets of the Gourmet Kingdom like "beating a dead horse", " fucking quit already", "wish they would just shutup", "princess is as barren as a toadstool without water", and "losers".
The prince and the princess knew the time had come to make a change. The princess backed this up with her trusty fairy godfather Dr Phil. He kept saying to the princess "How is this working for you?"
The prince and the princess replied in unison "It is not". Well that settled it...the two were moving to the land of Ovulation.
The story has not ended yet..there are many lands to traverse but do picture Princess Gourmet and Prince Semen At Sea heading of into the sunset.
Dryly put ...David and I are migrating South. That is the plan as of now. We are putting most of our buildings up for sale and moving to Mexico. The need for change is at desperate levels....code red.
Of course it is not the answer to all of our problems nor do I think everything will fall into place and we can say that we will live happily ever after,but, it is a start. Zihuatanejo was my town. I really sensed a feeling of belonging and homey feeling that I have never felt in St Louis. I always knew I would get back there ..I just did not know when.
I am throwing caution to the winds of change and plunging into another risk. Infertility becomes a bit dicey but with possibilities.
My gut feeling is that nothing was going to move forward for me until my life settled a little. Maybe I do need to "just relax". I am just saying that it could not hurt. Treatment, if we decided to go the IVF route, could easily be done in Mexico City...a short plane ride away. Adoption is a bit trickier.
Infertility limbo is where I am. I will get settled and then re-evaluate our options. So that is my little secret.
The fairytale continues.