So now I owe you two posts today. I already broke my promise yesterday. Pathetic.
I have good reason for breaking my promise. David and I had our second date out since the Scarlinator joined our happy home. Grand ma-ma and her husband (pa-pa) came to spend the night last night so David and I could date!
We went to a fund-raiser for legalizing midwifery in Missouri. As many of you may know that in my past life as a presumed fertile I was trained as a midwife. After all of the infertility it was just too hard to press on seeing beautiful births while I struggled so hard to get pregnant. Accompanied by the fact that it is a felony in this state I could not risk practicing especially when Scarlett came home.
Please go here to this website to learn about this documentary. I thought it was a fair take on the side of midwifery. I strongly believe in choice for women's right to birth where they feel comfortable. That being said I fully support women to birth in a hospital with a planned c-section if they choose and all the way to the other spectrum of an unassisted birth at home. All births can be magical no matter where they are as long as women are comfortable and in charge of the process. It is when the choices are removed that I begin to seethe with anger.
I am a home-birth midwife. This means that I want to do births at home and not in a hospital setting. My agenda is to be with a woman who has chosen to be at home. I never would force my opinions on any woman and recognize my abilities and desires to be with a woman in a place of her choosing. Having said this I am also grateful that there are fabulous surgeons who can save moms or babies when there is clearly a life-threatening situation. Part of my training is to recognize risks and access the safety in the situation. I would only attend healthy moms with healthy babies.
What I do find frustrating and will open my big mouth about is the misconception that birth is a healthy process in most cases and that there is to much knife-centric birthing in America. We clearly have the worst maternal and fetal death rates in the industrialized world! There are third world countries who have far fewer deaths! That is pathetic! Again I want to make it clear that if a woman plans her c-section I am all for it. That is her right. But if a woman wants a natural birth then she should have one as long as it progresses in a normal manner. The problem is that often times a labor is not progressing in a standardized linear fashion and because she does not fit between perfect and perfect the threat is "we need to save the baby and sectioning is the safest way to go" mentality. The response that sectioning is safer has stemmed from so many lawsuits. A doctor can say that they did all they could if they sectioned the baby.
I do not at all believe that most doctors out there are doing it just to save their asses. I think the average doctor out there is a good person doing a good job in the way they were trained. Three doctors were asked on the film when they had witnessed a normal and natural birth and they replied almost never. That is sad. The midwifery care model does see natural birth often succeed.
I have been at many natural births with wonderful outcomes. So I know that it can work most of the time. There have been a few problems in the past and usually there have been roadsigns for us midwives to take action and transport to the hospital. Life is never perfect, nor are births.
Back to date-night! The lights went of in the auditorium and first thing I said is time to make out! We properly held hands throughout. We sadly behaved. David had said before the film that he had had a crush on Ricki Lake. Well, he got to see her boobs. I immaturely jabbed him during her birthing video and pointed this out. He is a boob man through and through. All joking aside she had a wonderful birth that made us cry.
It was a good turn-out. Many people came and even the senator of Missouri was there with his wife and child in support!
After we went to dinner and talked about our darling over tapas...this was after we called home to hear of her evening. We had wished she was there with us! Pathetic in love parents!
I always wished that my child would have the experience of being born at home. Of course my defective ovaries Paris and Nicole succeeded in keeping me from screeching under my own table with a gazillion pets scattering with fear as I properly birthed my baby. But, the beauty is that my wish did come true. Scarlett's birthmother refused to go to the hospital and birthed at home in Antigua. Wishes do come true just sometimes in a round about sort of way!